Ouch..

Of all things.. you really had to test me on this?

What a test indeed. Taking something which I find and thought of as most precious at the moment.

Like Abraham, You tested his love for You when You told him to sacrifice His one and only son for You.

Like Job, You tested him by destroying all that he had, just to test his heart, loyalty and love for You.

And now.. You tested me with this? It hurts Father. It really really hurts. The pain from punching the floor and the wall repeatedly itself was not as painful as the pain I went through that time...

But I believe, there was a reason for You doing all these. And I believe that everything You do has a reason and a purpose for it. Give me the strength that I need to go through this. Give me the strength to find the joy that I've lost because of it. Give me your overwhelming love, comfort and presence that I so much needed right now.

And now as I ponder...You Yourself did the ultimate sacrifice by giving Your son for me.Were You happy about it? No. It surely did hurt You badly no, Papa?

But You still did because of Your abundant love for us... therefore I thank You for that Father. I thank You Jesus for it. May this experience be a learning lesson for me to grow. May this hurt be turned into joy once again knowing the fact You will carry me through the whole thing with Your everlasting love and grace.

I will turn my sorrow into happiness. I will turn my grieve into shouts of joy. I will proclaim my praises and worship to You evermore. Let my sacrifice be the sweetest aroma I can ever possibly give You.

You give and take away,
Blessed be the name of the Lord.